My greatest fear…

I have lots of fears.

Snakes.

Mice.

Driving across large bridges.

My daughters becoming strippers.

The demise of MAC Cosmetics.

Salmonella.

Parallel parking my SUV.

Forgetting to renew my subscription to People Magazine.

Some are relevant but most are silly.

However, they are real to me and since this is my soap box, I get to share my neurotic symptomology with all of you.

Yesterday, Glenn Beck announced he was suffering from macular dystrophy and would likely be blind within a year.

Now I have a new fear.

I don’t want to go blind.

 Never, ever, ever.

Most of you probably think it’s because I would be unable to adapt, because I wouldn’t see my girls beautiful faces or be unable to drive.

Well yes, that would be part of the fear, but I know I would adapt and my memory would serve me well in remembering faces, colors, landscapes and navigating.

The MAIN reason I am scared to death of going blind is my husband.

He would then be in charge of the task of dressing me.

Holy Crap.  (Shudder) It makes me just nauseous thinking about it.

I mean, he’s a great dresser. He has good taste in his own clothes.

But for me…..eehhmm, well, not so much.

You see, I like to dress like this…

And he would like for me to dress like this…

Not just in the privacy of our bedroom…but out in public.

Uh, yeah.

You see my concern?

I can NOT be walking around in stripper heels, wearing a trashy outfit from cheapstrippers.com while trying to read the braille version of Garden & Gun Magazine.

It just can’t happen folks.

Tonight won’t you all join with me in prayer to the patron saint of eyesight, Saint Lucy for the preservation of my eyesight?

Thank you Jesus.

Amen.

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