These people aren’t exactly my favorite.
I mean, they’re kinda like those relatives you see at family reunions, you’re cordial when you have to be but you’d rather not ever hear from them again. You know, those relatives that are always asking for money…and more money…and then they take it and blow it on something stupid like a cell phone or a party for a bunch of a-holes? Well, that’s basically what the government does with my tax dollars….but on a much grander scale.
Anyhoo, I just got finished paying my 2007 taxes. Like, 2 months ago. And yesterday, I mailed my 2008 corporate taxes and the bill wasn’t bad.
The sun was so bright I had to wear shades….
And then someone thought it would be a good idea to send me this…
Uh, yeah. That says I owe $86,655.
After falling down in the driveway, clutching my chest and then looking for Ashton Kutcher, I realize that this is not a joke but a terrible mistake.
People, if I made the kind of money that would require me to pay this kind of tax bill, do you seriously think I would spend my days eating filet of bologna and planning my social calender around the upcoming Cow Days Festival of Hooterville?
I think not.
My days would be spent with a pool boy that looks like David Beckham and a full time maid.
Just sayin’.
Kiki said,
September 16, 2009 at 9:43 pm:
I can’t believe that number. Is that for real? I just don’t believe it. I have never owed the IRS money and that is the second biggest fear. The first is identity theft. Cows Days festival sounds fun. Take care.
Lara said,
September 16, 2009 at 9:46 pm:
WOAH! Scary.
Yea, part of those tax dollars are for the lovely souped up blackberry the president has. WHAT?!
Debbie said,
September 16, 2009 at 10:47 pm:
That makes we want to drink. Is it for real? You can always have more tax write-offs…I mean kids.
Heather P. said,
September 17, 2009 at 12:37 am:
After Cow Days you have got to come to London for the World Chicken Festival. NO I’m not kidding.
Becky said,
September 17, 2009 at 6:39 am:
Geez, most people don’t even make that much money, much less have a tax bill that high.
Looks like someone got a little keystroke happy.
Kiki said,
September 17, 2009 at 6:57 am:
I have something that will make you feel all better…an award for you over at my blog. I hope your IRS bill gets sorted out soon. I also hope you get to talk to the fool you made the error on the phone. Take care.
Futureblackmail said,
September 17, 2009 at 7:20 am:
They must have just done some grand mailing cause I got one too. Now, mine only said I owe $68 for some mistake but STILL – just leave me alone already IRS people!!!
AiredaleGirl said,
September 17, 2009 at 9:50 am:
Oh. My. God. This is about as good as the time the idiot at Centre’s admissions office told me that their financial aid calculations said Mom and Dad could contribute over $100K out of current income per year to my college education. Mom borrowed money from my uncle to buy my prom dress that year!
Who does this math? Drunk monkeys???
Jill said,
September 17, 2009 at 10:16 am:
We get random letters for our business from the IRS saying we owe something when we don’t. They make for great Holy Shit, we’re f*&%ed moments.
Sassy Chica said,
September 17, 2009 at 10:26 am:
Oh the government….love their sense of humor!
When it’s your error they are after you in a hot second, but if you try to ge them to fix an error, well take a number and have a seat it will be a while.
Smooches,
Sassy Chica
justanotherdayinparadise said,
September 17, 2009 at 12:01 pm:
you just raised my blood pressure, and I’m hours away! Good luck reaching someone who knows anything by phone. . .
Arlington said,
September 19, 2009 at 3:42 am:
They mudt have just done some grand mailing cause I got ome tko. Now, mine only said I owe $68 for some mistake but STILL – just leave me alone already IRS people!!!;
pissy said,
September 20, 2009 at 7:01 pm:
OMG!!!!!!! I would DIE if I opened something with numbers like that.
DIE, I tell you…..
Good luck with this!