People, I have a problem.
A real problem.
There is a mouse in my house.
Now I know you are all thinking this is NO BIG DEAL. That I live out in the sticks and this is just a way of life in Hooterville.
But that’s where you’re all wrong.
I have deep psychological issues people.
When I was just a kid, my mother spotted a mouse sitting on the back of the coach and decided to take the broom and whack the crap out of it. Well, that would have been a GREAT idea had I known what the crap was going on. So one minute I’m sitting there eating my Cheez Whiz and Doritos and the next I am being attacked with a broom by my mother and a mouse is flying through the air.
It scared me. I mean, to this day, I can not eat Cheez Whiz without breakin’ out in a cold sweat.
Fast forward several years, I’m 24 and having to stay alone in my house. It’s late…dark…quiet. All of the sudden, I could hear the little suckers scratchin’ in my kitchen…looking for my Doritos, no doubt. I would get up and beat around and then they would stop…but then start again…louder and louder. I just knew one of them was gonna get in my bed.
So, I did the most rational thing I could think of….I slept in my car for two days until the sucker was caught.
Tonight I am here with Ella. Rico has left to go coon hunting. He has left me all alone in this house with a freaking mouse so he can go watch a bunch of dogs chase raccoons up a tree.
What he should really be doing is hunting down that mouse in this three story house so I don’t pack up his daughter and sleep in the SUV.
Seriously.
Kiki said,
July 31, 2009 at 6:59 am:
I have a horrific fear of mice. We have had to endure two cycles of the rodents at my home. The last invasion was last summer. The mouse guy came the year prior and laid poison out under the house. Got ‘em. Then last summer as I was putting hubby’s shorts away in his drawer I noticed something scurry. I freaked. He came running in and found a mama and her new babies. My hysterical screaming and tears threw my son into a similar fit. We ran out of the house together. Hubby came out carrying the family and proceeded to crush them. I can’t remember which weapon he used since I have blocked that day out. I refused to return inside for a few hours after that, still frozen and hysterical. The mouse guy came back and found a dead mouse in the wall. I guessed that was the daddy. I didn’t sleep for days fearing family members would return for revenge and come into our bed. I still can’t put shorts away in that drawer. I hope you find some peace and the mouse leaves you alone. Take care.
Jill said,
July 31, 2009 at 9:52 am:
Yep, take care of the critters IN the house before the ones outside.
Sharlene said,
July 31, 2009 at 12:38 pm:
Yesterday I found a dead rat covered in ants in our tiny suburban backyard! I am almost died. I had to clean it up cuz the kids were back there and if my daughter would have seen it she would have been scarred for life. I feel faint just thinking about it. Ew! Ew! Ew!
Life Love and Lola said,
July 31, 2009 at 2:21 pm:
I would be sleeping in the SUV too…Or you could go check in to The Ritz.
Becky said,
July 31, 2009 at 7:29 pm:
Now you don’t want him blowing holes in the floor of that purdy house do you? Cause you know if he’s gonna hunt, he’s gonna hunt with a big gun. tee hee
One Pink Fish said,
July 31, 2009 at 8:03 pm:
Right, there with ya. When I was about 7 months pregnant, a rat (not a little rat… a HUGE rat) jumped out of the closest in the garage and landed on my stomach. I screamed holy h*** and ran for it. By this time the rat had fallen off. We were building the house at that time. I ran and jumped to get up on the concrete slab and missed. I hit belly first on the concrete. I was fine, but all the workers, my hub’s buddies, and my husband were freakin’. Needless to say the rat’s life came to and end that very same night. Unfortunately he lost his head.
Anyways, stop on by onepinkfish to pick up a blog award.
http://www.sandersmemoirs.blogspot.com
Momisodes said,
July 31, 2009 at 9:13 pm:
OMG! OMG! OMG!
I hate mice.
We had them in our last house. A TON of them. I can still the scratching…and footsteps at night in the attic *shudders*.
Hang in there honey. I’d totally camp out in the car, too.
AiredaleGirl said,
August 1, 2009 at 5:39 pm:
CALL MY PARENTS AND BORROW THEIR CAT!
AiredaleGirl said,
August 1, 2009 at 5:41 pm:
On second thought, doesn’t Farmchick have a Jack Russell? That’s what they’re bred for…
Pissy said,
August 1, 2009 at 9:21 pm:
EWWWW!!!!
Thank goodness it’s not a snake(s)! That’s my biggest fear! ACK!
justanotherdayinparadise said,
August 5, 2009 at 10:49 am:
totally with you. I have threatened to move over mice. . .and would have! Hubby is responsible for mice and snakes. I’m responsible for all creepy crawly insects, namely, spiders.
Debbie said,
August 20, 2009 at 4:36 pm:
OMG! I just killed a huge mouse in my house a few days ago and I am so traumatized that there was a mouse in my house and I didn’t know it for some time. I can’t go in my bathroom without looking around real good first, my H swears I need therapy. I’m glad I’m not the only one who has mouse issues!