Fifteen months ago, I made a rash decision. Leave it to the advertising world to make me fall in love with Land Rover, leave it to the financial wizards to make leasing affordable.
Leasing the Rover was a wise tax move, as it is a “business” vehicle….BWAHAHAHA!!!!
Seriously, important bid’ness goes on in that vehicle seeing as I am not only the brains of this operation but also the beauty. Gawd, help us all.
So fifteen months ago, I went to the dealership and they schmoozed me. It was all “You are so fabulous SFM and your hawtness would only be complemented with this glorious vehicle…just think of the complimentary oil changes…your childless trips to the posh city of Brentwood…the courtesy sheik pimp mobile we will furnish you while your vehicle is here…the dining and shopping for the day trip her while we service your fabulous ride….would you like a glass of wine while you ponder that ?”
So’s today I head to the big city all deck out in my pirate flip flops, cause that’s how I roll when I go big time, and upon arrival to said dealership for my scheduled oil change I was told, “I’m sorry, Ma”am, we don’t have any courtesy vehicles.”
There was no “Your Hawtness” or “Miss Fabulous SFM How the Hell You Been?”
I politely say, “Excuse me, but I scheduled my oil change a month ago…and I was told I would have a courtesy vehicle and in the event one wasn’t available, you would rent a car (AGHAST…a rental) for me to spend my fabulous childless day and by damn, I want my car and I want it now.”
So Birkenstock Granola boy says, “Ma’am, I’m really sorry, we are out of loaners and we don’t do rentals anymore.”
Me, “Not even for sheiks?”
“Cause you know I gots like 2 quarts of oil in the back hatch there… still in the container and some left over sand in the back floor board…you put a red and white tablecloth on my head and I’m the freaking sheik of Hooterville…so’s go get my friggin sheik pimp mobile!”
Granola boy picks up the phone I’m convinced to call the police but instead the manager…
So’s I explain to the manager that “I have not had breakfast, nor lunch and my blood sugar must be low…thus the jibberish about being the redneck sheik and I need food bad ’cause I’m so hungry I think I got the rickets so could somebody give me a ride to Chili’s…oh, and I forgot to tell you I’m packing heat in the vehicle…don’t be alarmed the clip ain’t in it…all sheiks carry heat.”
When he finally picks his mouth up off the floor he says, “Ma’am, I will try to find you a ride…but it may be 20 to 30 minutes…you may want to walk…it’s not that far.”
I have literally scared the bejesus out of these people and now have to walk in tony Brentwood in my redneck pirate flip flops across 6 lanes of traffic filled with sheik pimp rides and Mercedes to get some friggin food…and since I’m by myself and driving I can’t even let off some steam with a margarita, I had to settle with the house wine of the south…sweet tea.
Pissy said,
March 26, 2009 at 9:54 pm:
I think you need to write a letter to the Land Rover people.
This is appalling treatment!
Appalling, I say!!!!!!!!
Momisodes said,
March 27, 2009 at 8:09 am:
Wow! What an ordeal.
I’d definitely make a stink.
Sheiks certainly deserve better treatment.
Laura said,
March 27, 2009 at 9:19 am:
I agree with both — it is appalling and not up to par for sheiks! I can’t believe how disrespectful…..and you had to walk that is just ridiculous!!!!
But I have to admit, I get a good laugh out of your ordeals….this shit only happens in the movies. You need to make a movie or write a book. LOL….maybe George can play the leading man in your movie
Renée aka Mekhismom said,
March 27, 2009 at 9:40 am:
OMG! I am so upset for you. I cannot believe that they insulted you in this way. Seriouisly – you need to write a letter. They did NOT say you can walk, it isn’t that far!
AiredaleGirl said,
March 29, 2009 at 1:52 pm:
And this is why Dr. and Mrs. AiredaleParents always drive something for which there is a dealership within an hour or less radius of Hooterville.
I think I might’ve suggested that they either take you somewhere in their Courtesy Shuttle (I mean, seriously, Nissan of Lake Redneckville has one, Range Rover of Brentwood doesn’t? Come ON, pull the other one), or at least have called Enterprise to get you a little rollerskate in which to tool around Greater Nashville until they were through with your car.
Jac said,
March 30, 2009 at 4:04 pm:
They suggested you walk?!?! Oh My Gawd!! Seriously?? I’d have raised hell then and there! I can’t believe they didn’t even offer the courtesy shuttle or like wise! (My small-town, ghettoville VW dealer called me a taxi when they didn’t have a shuttle…)
Candace said,
March 31, 2009 at 1:50 pm:
I’ve noticed the same thing at the BMW dealership when I take my car in for service. They’re not nearly as attentive as they used to be, and loaner cars are about impossible to acquire. I am not pleased with this AT ALL! As the wise Avril Lavigne says, “I’m the muthaf***in’ princess!” Treat me that way, Bavarian Motor Works!
Wesekelroosul said,
May 11, 2009 at 9:10 am:
Bink shoved black female [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/psilocybin-psilocyn-based-drugs/]psilocybin psilocyn based drugs[/url] and keep the paper [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/lamisil-selsun/]commercial selsun blue actress[/url] urn frowned was larger [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/flomax-tamsulosin-minnesota/]tamsulosin flomax[/url] squeeze around hey wanted [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/tretinoin-cream-05/]tretinoin cream usp[/url] winged monster only held [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/paroxetine-depression-other/]599 paroxetine results[/url] evenly matched and more [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/sale-claritin-reditabs/]claritin[/url] bright idea new location [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/interaction-diazepam-drug/]diazepam no perscription[/url] and tacking turn anything [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/30-mg-temazepam/]temazepam half life[/url] arrow observed then hesitated [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/amitriptyline-elavil/]elavil 10 mg headaches[/url] was cool things could [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/compazine-prescribed-for/]compazine antihistamine[/url] fire singed nother affirmativ [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/cefzil-side-effects/]cefzil to treat a biol[/url] mortal creature herself that [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/cut-10-mg-cyclobenzaprine-in-half/]cyclobenzaprine drug panel test[/url] centuries before that could [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/danger-of-zanaflex/]tizanidine zanaflex[/url] really effective were tangible [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/medication-half-life-fosamax/]osteoclastic activity and fosamax[/url] young had around her [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/ecstasy-tests/]ecstasy orgasm face[/url] olph hauled but known [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/coreg-125-mg-tablet/]coreg generic united states[/url] gourd after cast itself [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/verapamil-cr-180-mg/]verapamil digoxin interaction[/url] and married and thickening [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/alcohol's-effect-on-driving/]alcohol methylic[/url] especially good different color [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/hct-triamterene/]sidmak laboratories inc sulfamethoxazole triamterene[/url] ada was not multiple [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/asian-flu-tamiflu/]make tamiflu who[/url] her staff the desk [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/buy-orlistat-online-without-prescription/]orlistat used for[/url] had deliberate imensional solidity [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/psilocyn-side-effects-gjj/]psilocybin psilocyn based drugs[/url] serpent folk ike the [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/tetracycline-proteus-penner/]tetracycline is used to treat[/url] this stage horse trotted [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/veetids-tablets-500mg-tab/]veetids 500mg[/url] our trek accepting that [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/pioglitazone-rosiglitazone/]pioglitazone gar[/url] day mare right one [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/flextra-mulco/]flextra caps[/url] and below idea appealed [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/mixing-lexapro-flexeril-and-bourbon/]hydrocodone mixed with flexeril[/url] new and olph laughed [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/suprax-400mg/]suprax for sale[/url] stop adventurin back the [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/denavir-levitra/]cheap denavir[/url] capture her throw these [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/fluconazole-capsule/]fluconazole suspension preparation[/url] second pass living human [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/durabrand-dur-10/]dell dimension 8200 disque dur 160[/url] rene started hey grabbed [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/online-cheap-sumatriptan/]sumatriptan fda[/url] herself from own nestling [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/clomiphene-citrate-pill/]clomiphene clomid fertility drugs[/url] hard she mean your [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/beckman-allegra-centrifuge/]yamaha allegra sax[/url] fearing embarrassm sinned before [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/herbal-viagra-viagra/]free sex video man viagra hard[/url] temporary form stranger have [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/xenical-online-bestellen/]xenical issues[/url] erwin was fair number [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/premarin-vaginal-cream-wrinkles/]premarin 0 625mg[/url] just explored doing that [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/viagra-below-wholesale/]buy cheap discount pill viagra viagra[/url] any gourd different idea [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/lasix-treatment-for-vascular-stroke/]lasix side effects[/url] ila the hard and [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/trimox-tablets/]trimox 500 mg[/url] for help portal for [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/over-the-counter-fluconazole/]fluconazole on line[/url] throwing off skeleton crew [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/hyzaar-abuse/]drug called hyzaar[/url] had arm valid offer [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/dose-lethal-xanax/]buy xanax without prescription[/url] orceress protested always done [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/fulvicin-uf/]fulvicin[/url] she merely warning was [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/avandia-attorneys/]lawsuit avandia[/url] and obnoxiousn his problem [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/scoplamine-transderm-v-information-motion-sickness/]fentanyl transderm upper respiratory infections[/url] love her stop them [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/side-effects-of-nifedipine-ointment/]drug interactions nifedipine adalat adverse events[/url] friend stood transition between [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/compare-zocor-prices/]zocor nerve[/url] see far whose wings [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/softtabs-prescription-information/]cheap softtabs zenegra[/url] represent the quite satisfied [url=http://iwjsjwe.com/buta-apap-caff-90-tablets/]kiki buta[/url] skull seemed erreacting.
Jenn aka Future Mama said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:07 am:
aww, I’m so sorry about that! But you know… it made for a great blog post! haha!
The Redhead Riter said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:46 am:
That’s awful!
Katie Lane said,
June 1, 2009 at 2:54 am:
I hate when company trick us like that! They sell cars there right? Well they should have given you the keys to one of them!! Or at least given you a ride.
And can I ask what’s up with comment #8?
Tammy said,
June 1, 2009 at 5:03 am:
There is a special place in hell for car dealers.
Type A Mommy said,
June 1, 2009 at 5:18 am:
Car dealers are so smarmy, aren’t they????? Yuck. You should totally write a nastygram to the Land Rover people, and tell them that until this ordeal is remedied to your satisfaction, that you’ll be sharing your sad story with as many people on the web that you can find. Maybe that will get you your courtesy sheik pimpmobile…
Yaya said,
June 1, 2009 at 5:25 am:
Oh I know how it is when you’re hungry! I recently started dieting and the other week I suddenly snapped on my cashier as I was checking out of the store and I said to myself in my head…’maybe I should eat something…’ LOL!
EMILY said,
June 1, 2009 at 6:19 am:
What an awful treament for a shiek to recive…I’m tellin’ ya from one sheik to another “Heads Shall Roll” 80)
Creative Junkie said,
June 1, 2009 at 6:31 am:
There’s not much worse than spending your free time stuck in a service center waiting room reading 3 year old magazines and watching The View with 15 other angry people.
I feel your pain.
Lisa said,
June 1, 2009 at 6:32 am:
Well that really stinks. I’m tellin ya it wouldnt’ happen here…( i hope)
at least you have a sense of humour..too funny
Lisa
cat said,
June 1, 2009 at 6:50 am:
That is such crappy service, my gosh! Greetings form South Africa.
Laretha said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:39 am:
hi.lar.i.ous.
I have pirate flip flops too – they have bling on them too.
They didn’t make you walk? Seriously. With a lot full of cars. They would’ve been giving me some keys for a “test drive”…if you know what I mean!
Teri said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:55 am:
That is terrible!!!!!!
JenniferJuniper said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:58 am:
Really, the pirate flip flops should have warned them…they never learn.
Happy sits
WhatACard said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:17 am:
The nerve! That’s no way to treat a sheik!
Chelsie said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:18 am:
You are absolutely hilarious
Rachel said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:18 am:
Car dealers are the worst!
Jamie said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:23 am:
That is SOOO NOT the way to treat a sheik at all!
Janna said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:45 am:
Those are awesome pirate flip flops.
Jadehollow said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:51 am:
Wow.. if you local paper has a public comment section you should send this post to them lol. Once they have your money.. all the love is gone.
Great post.. happy SITS Day!
Debbie
hillori said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:08 am:
at least you didn’t have a bunch of kids with you!!
Michele said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:22 am:
That settles it. You are just my kinda gal. I love it!
Ah, but sorry you had a rough morning. Kinda.
Trina@ Our Crazy Life said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:23 am:
You better believe that my redneck arse would be complaining to Land Rover Headquarters. Never know, you might be able to get some Chili’s gift certificates or something for next time out of it??!?!?
Reluctant Housewife said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:36 am:
That’s not right! You shouldn’t have to walk when they promised you a pimped out loaner. Yeesh.
Laura Day said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:39 am:
Happy SITS Day!!
Emily said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:57 am:
Well, this is life in the 21st century!
Preston said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:11 am:
Typical car dealership. They really don’t care much for the customer once the purchase has been made.
Tonya Goin said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:17 am:
That is so funny you scared the crap out of them! They deserved it for sure!
Jen said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:20 am:
Visiting from SITs again. I love reading your posts, you are a great writer. Stupid car dealerships, they say whatever it takes to make a sale.
shortmama said,
June 1, 2009 at 11:18 am:
ah yes apparently it doesnt matter what you buy or lease, car dealerships still suck!
Mindy said,
June 1, 2009 at 11:31 am:
Bait and switch! It is all about getting the sale! Sheesh!
Mindy
Adopt a ‘Do – Cute Girls Hairstyles
Brooke said,
June 1, 2009 at 11:56 am:
Wow. Car dealers…. ugh.
lisa said,
June 1, 2009 at 11:56 am:
love the flip flops!! the story is always funny later..when it’s over!! I’m glad it ‘s over!!
Jill said,
June 1, 2009 at 12:01 pm:
I would be writing a letter on Sheik letterhead for sure!
Happy SITS day!
Jen, buried with children said,
June 1, 2009 at 12:24 pm:
now that is just not right!
Connie@ Young and Relentless said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:13 pm:
How RUDE! You know dang well they had some grease monkey sitting on his @ss that could have given you a ride.
Chandy said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:28 pm:
Wow, I hate when that happens… You should’ve asked who scheduled you and asked that they pay for your lunch. LOL
Joy said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:38 pm:
Boy you slay me.
p.s. what’s up with Comment #8? It looks odd…maybe it’s my computer?!
The Mom @ Babes in Hairland said,
June 1, 2009 at 1:42 pm:
Oh that’s hilarious! Thanks for the good laugh. Hope your SITS day is fabulous!
Jamie said,
June 1, 2009 at 2:28 pm:
That is hilarious…I’ve scared a granola boy or two in my time too, tee hee!
Jamie
Sharon said,
June 1, 2009 at 2:41 pm:
I am glad you scarred the bejesus out of them! They deserve it. The poopheads should of had a car for you!
Happy FB day!
Melissa said,
June 1, 2009 at 3:45 pm:
I just don’t trust salesmen….all they care about is the $$$.:)
Betty said,
June 1, 2009 at 3:49 pm:
I would be pissed!
Laura said,
June 1, 2009 at 4:14 pm:
Oh no. I definitely would’ve complained too. I can’t believe they told you to walk. Ugh.
One Pink Fish said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:06 pm:
I was laughing out loud when reading your post. It sounds exactly like something that would have happened to me. I feel your pain. Plus, the south ain’t that cool this time of year… or March either for that matter.
jeanine said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:28 pm:
coming over for the SITS – I never laugh out loud reading the computer … until I met you. My family is wondering what is going on with me ? I just tell them its YOU !
Pricilla said,
June 1, 2009 at 7:32 pm:
The horror!
Happy SITS day!
Michelle(hometc) said,
June 1, 2009 at 8:27 pm:
This reminds me, I’m way overdue for an oil change!
Mama Kat said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:40 pm:
I usually just have sex with them to get what I want. Haven’t missed a meal yet.
Regina @ Margarita Bloom said,
June 1, 2009 at 9:43 pm:
Oh, goodness tell me they did not tell you to WALK?? I would have given them one of those stares like… what. did. you. say? I don’t think I heard you right.
That’s atrocious customer service treatment. I wouldn’t be caught dead treating my customers like that!
Vickie said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:04 pm:
I would complain too! Them jerks!!
Kim said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:10 pm:
Another great post. I hope you had a great SITS day I will be sure to stop back again!
Kim
Michelle said,
June 1, 2009 at 10:47 pm:
Somehow… I have a feeling that they’ve made a note in your account. There will always be a courtesy vehicle waiting for you, won’t there?
Margaret (Nanny Goats) said,
June 1, 2009 at 11:39 pm:
The NERVE of some dealerships…where do they get off treating the Sheik that way.
Also? Congrats on your big SITS feature day! Hope you’re enjoying the overwhelming comment love!
Sandra said,
June 2, 2009 at 12:28 am:
I love your writing style!
Mercedes said,
June 2, 2009 at 12:43 am:
Car dealers! Ugh!
brandy said,
June 2, 2009 at 9:32 am:
Figures. Once you got the car, they are never as nice. Besides that’s why I got married; HE gets the oil changed in my car. Sheesh. I’m much too important to worry about those little details.
Sweet tea is the nectar of the Gods.
Rhiannon said,
June 2, 2009 at 9:33 am:
bahahaha I love this. I can picture it unfolding in my mind and I just love it!!! Happy SITS Day! Hope you had a blast!!
Michelle said,
June 2, 2009 at 9:49 am:
I can’t believe they dissed you that way. Didnt they see the shoes?
NYC Mama said,
June 2, 2009 at 10:18 am:
Now you know to always pack really hot shoes in your trunk just in case — that way you won’t be caught in your pirate flip flops out in public. LOL.
Ali Holden said,
June 2, 2009 at 11:39 am:
a) you are not as mean of a bitch as I am. I would have taken my business elsewhere…
b) I love you and your flipflips!
Tranquility said,
June 2, 2009 at 1:45 pm:
Wow – maybe it was the lack of food, but I definitely would have had a serious yelling match…. uh, I mean “words” with the manager and without the promised loan vehichle would have immediately gone down the road to have my vehicle serviced!
What nerve, promising one thing and then wondering why your upset when you didn’t receive it!?!
Jessica said,
June 3, 2009 at 12:01 am:
You were pretty nice I think… bless your heart! Stopping by from SITS!
Rhonda said,
June 3, 2009 at 10:04 pm:
gotta love car dealers.
Visiting from SITS!