First of all, I really appreciate all the babysitting you’ve done for me lately. There’s been a lot of all- nighters that I don’t think I could have made it without you.
You’ve really taught Ella alot. You know… colors, shapes, manners…and those stupid little songs that she sings over and over. The ones that I find myself singing over and over and over.
However, I feel we’ve grown an unhealthy attachment to you. You run continuously on every DVD player in the house and cars.
Why is it we feel we have to have you 24/7? Will life as we know it stop to exist? Will we wither up and die?
No, Mr. Purple Dinosaur…we won’t. Life will go on…seasons will change…we will find more cartoons. Cartoons that are actually entertaining. Cartoons that will not encourage me to have homicidal thoughts.
Sometimes when I’m watching you sing and dance…I have this overwhelming urge to find you and push you down…and stomp a little…OK, alot. I know my kids would be horrified…but I would feel SO much better.
You’re old Barney. A has been…it’s time to retire. You need to lay on the beach somewhere in a big green thong and enjoy life. Drink fruity little drinks. Live the good life.
No more hanging around the school yard for you…it’s done. Besides, hanging out at the school all day is starting to make people think your a pedophile. It’s just getting creepy.
So, I’m saying adieu.
Adios, Barney….we are letting you go.
On second thought, could you just forget all that? Ella will be back from Nana’s tomorrow and it may be a long night.
Best,
SFM
Renée aka Mekhismom said,
September 13, 2008 at 12:53 am:
And it is for just this very reason that the purple one is not allowed in this house. I wouldn’t be able to stand it. Thank you Noogin and Sprout for interesting programing – we turn it off when Barney come on!
tipper said,
September 13, 2008 at 11:03 am:
My girls never cared for Barney and even made up a very mean song about poor Barney-but I won’t share it and embarass myself.
Queen of Planet Hotflash said,
September 13, 2008 at 1:38 pm:
Wait til she discovers the Wiggles and all the disney channel stuff that my grands just love
Farmchick said,
September 14, 2008 at 10:08 am:
Doesn’t she like Dora? She could watch it and learn a little Spanish….then she could order in Spanish at the new restaurant!
Chris H said,
September 15, 2008 at 3:26 am:
WE were plauged by the Smurfs when my first few were little.. now it’s SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS…. I soooo didn’t need to know he lived in a pineapple under the sea! I really really dislike Spongebob! I do not understand how I can end up singing the Spongebob song during the day…???? BUT I DO *SOB*
doodah said,
September 15, 2008 at 11:35 am:
My autistic son was absolutley fascinated with Barney and I thought I was going to have to destroy the VCR back then (he 16 now).
BTW Tipper, I think I know the mean Barney song. Did it have something to do with taking a flying F off of a mountain top?
Dejoni said,
September 15, 2008 at 12:31 pm:
Allright…I don’t know the song. Someone’s gonna have to email me so I can sing it in times of pure insanity.
Share the love.
tipper said,
December 13, 2009 at 10:10 pm:
My girls never cared for Barney and even made up a very mean song about poor Barney-but I won't share it and embarass myself.