Too Cool for the Pool
Since school starts in two weeks, I had a moment of weakness and decided to bring the kids to the beach for a couple of days. I had been reminiscing about all those fabulous family vacations at the shore I had as a child…playing in the sand, riding the waves, eating saltwater taffy and buying airbrushed t-shirts. Good times.
So we pack the SUV…bring plenty of Barney movies, snacks, juice, earplugs and nerve pills for me…even brought a babysitter to help . I have been here less than 48 hours and I am ready to go home.
The normally 9 hour drive took 12 because Rachel tried to use the bathroom at every McDonald’s between home and Gulf Shores thinking if we stop to pee…we can eat too. Thus Ella’s new word is “french fries.”
We finally arrive and go to dinner. Ella has had a good day but had saved her meltdown for the restaurant. I leave with her and walk home to the condo. She refuses to sleep and keeps us all up to 2 a.m.
You’d think that she would at least sleep in…NO! ‘Cause God has a sense of humor and he wants to remind me on a daily basis of why I don’t need anymore children. She gets up at 6:47. Why 6:47? Because she gets up EVERY DAY AT 6:47. No matter what time zone. No matter what time she goes to bed.
On top of all this, my oldest child’s flatulence has reached an all time odor level. The kid has problems. If she keeps this up, she will never get a man. It will not only burn the hair out of your nose but will make your eyes water. I don’t get Botox for the wrinkles in my forehead from aging…it’s from wrinkling my nose from the smell of that dang gas.
There is no need for sunscreen…as I have yet to be in the sun longer than an hour.
I hope someday my kids look back on these vacations and remember the “good” times.